Friday, October 05, 2018

by

Abby Zimet, staff writer

With Trump's latest abomination - smearing anguished survivors as paid "rude elevator screamers" - he earned this: See video spreading faster than the rage at the Supreme Court travesty under way of our vicious buffoon grandly, unwittingly lumber up the stairs of Air Force One after his Minnesota KKK rally and wave to his (presumably three) adoring fans with a highly visible strip of toilet paper stuck to his clown shoe.

Yes, it's real. No, for some reason we can only guess at - everyone well and truly despises him? - none of the Very Serious dark-suited Secret Service guys or any of his many friends, so many friends, chose to tell him.

Similarly, nobody told him there might be a proofreading problem with the latest shrieking White House call for everyone to work hard to ensure lyin' frat boy Brett Kavanaugh is confirmed to the Senate - yes, it said the Senate. That's just idiotic business as usual. But the toilet paper trick: That was some kind of uncommon poetic justice. Cue too-good-to-be-true metaphors - asswipe, flush yourself, shitshow, too much wiping not winning, America in the toilet - along with conjectures - maybe it was his tax returns or a mini-Constitution - and empathy for the toilet paper. We know: It's small. Today, it's all we've got. Laugh, weep, keep on fighting.